Think of me as an ombudsman of cheeseburgers, if you will.
This series will allow you to more correctly account for your daily caloric intake.
Today’s Fat Fact: If no one sees you eat it, and you leave no evidence – the calories, grams of fat, points, whatever metric you use to quantify your intake, are nonexistent.
It’s TRUE and before you go and hog wash me, I’d like you to take a moment and consider two factors that I know you’ll agree are true:
1) How many fat ninja have you seen in your life?
(I’m bet your answer is a big FAT zero!)
2) How many times have you witnessed a ninja eating?
(I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess this number too, is ZERO!)
No one ever sees ninja eat, so they never get fat.
There you have it folks, irrefuteable logic that if you, like ninja, are not seen consuming a bacon double cheeseburger, large fries and a giant sized coke in your car in the parking lot outside of work – you need not count those calories against yourself! Even if you already ate lunch and plan on eating a full dinner when you get home!
*Please note, Chris Farley’s character in Beverly Hills Ninja was not taken into consideration in determining Ninja statistics as Chris Farley was not actually a ninja, but an actor playing a ninja. Movies are make believe, duh!
